Richard Stallman doesn't read web pages. They write to him.
When Richard Stallman makes a sudo command, he loses permissions.
Whenever Richard Stallman points at a Windows computer, it segfaults.
Richard Stallman wrote a program that divides by zero.
Richard Stallman's compiler is afraid to report errors.
Richard Stallman wrote the compiler God used. The Big Bang was the Universe's first segfault.
Richard Stallman can make infinite loops end.
Richard Stallman's computer doesn't have a clock, it defines what time it is.
Richard Stallman wrote a program to compute the last digit of pi.
Richard Stallman doesn't use web browsers. Emacs connects directly to the network driver and he reads and writes TCP/IP himself.

More of them here

PS: bonus one

Stallman never showers: he runs 'make clean'.